Discipline for Smart People    

For the first time in many years I will be presenting public seminars.They are listed below:

October 30 - Omaha, Nebraska
http://conferences.unl.edu

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November 27 - Long Beach, California

November 29 - Los Angeles, California

December 3 - Covina, California

December 5 - Anaheim, California

December 7 - Pasadena, California
http://www.oci-sems.com/

See my complete speaker calendar.

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Posted In: Discipline without Stress On: September 20, 2007: 10:58 am: By Marvin Marshall

Here is how a school librarian who knows the Marvin Marshall approach uses it to have students return books. Before adopting this smart approach, the librarian would send out overdue library notices on three different colors:The first color was a notice that the book was overdue.

The second colored notice announced that a book was really late and that the next notice would be a detention.

The third was a notice that the book was three weeks overdue and that the student had to serve a detention.

The process had turned into a bit of a joke with students who learned that the first two notices really didn’t count. The librarian was sending out more than 200 notices each week.

This is what she wrote in the announcements with a smart approach:
“What would a responsible student do today to renew or return a book before overdue notices tomorrow?”

The only problem with the approach was that the librarian was overwhelmed with students returning or renewing their books that day.

She sent almost no late notices the next day. Wow!

If we would only remember that positivity, choice, and reflection are less stressful and more effective than older, negative, and threatening approaches!

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Posted In: Promoting Responsibility On: : 10:47 am: By Marvin Marshall

Periodically, I receive e-mail from a primary teacher who has second thoughts about using the vocabulary of the Social Development Hierarchy. The problem so often is that the adult is uncomfortable with the terms “anarchy” and “bullying.”Two points are important regarding the vocabulary of the hierarchy:
(1) The way to learn a concept is to have a way to describe it. This is the reason that one of the most fundamental approaches to success in school is vocabulary development. This seems rather obvious since vocabulary words are taught as soon as youngsters enter school.

(2) Adults associate the two unacceptable lower levels as negatives. When these words are used, adults conjure up negative thoughts and feelings about them. That is the very point and the reason these terms should be taught. We want the same negative thoughts and feelings to arise in young people when they describe these unacceptable levels. Young people are in the process of becoming adults. The way to develop responsible adults is to expose young people to ideas, rather than hide negatives from them so that they grow up not being able to discern what is appropriate and what is not.

The following is a communication I received from a kindergarten teacher shedding light on the point.

“I have used the hierarchy in Kindergarten and was surprised how quickly the Kindergarten students were able to pick up the language and were able to label situations as “Anarchy” and “Bullying.” It was a particularly challenging class. We used the Happy Face poster and discussed how Level A and Level B usually results in tears. We talked about what C and D levels are like in the hallway, in the bathroom, etc.

“It was very effective. Kindergarten students were certainly able to reflect on their behavior and discuss how to change it.

“It works and it was great!”

Read this for a further understanding of the Hierarchy of Social Development.

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Posted In: Discipline without Stress On: : 10:12 am: By Marvin Marshall

We think in the box because it is the only box given us. That is, our thoughts almost automatically become restricted to that which is presented to us.The mother asks the youngster whether he would prefer fish or liver for dinner. Sometimes neither of the options is preferable, but we have a tendency to choose from these restricted options presented to us.

The more a person’s self-talk begins with, “Are these my only choices?” the more options will be discovered. A typical example is the oft-quoted question, “Is the glass half empty or half full?” The optimist responds that the glass is half full. The pessimist responds that the glass is half empty.

But the pragmatist responds, “You’ve got twice as much glass as you need.”

Invariably, humor aside, other options exist, and they will be discovered if the simple question is repeated, “Are these my only choices?”

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Posted In: Increasing Effectiveness On: : 10:02 am: By Marvin Marshall